Thursday, February 16, 2006
Where Paros are not Considered Outsiders...
By Brij Khandelwal
Agra: It hardly matters where they come from. Bangladesh, Bihar or from some nondescript district on eastern border. They have no past, worth remembering, and they seldom face an identity crisis, as both history and geography do not interest them. Poverty has driven them to seek greener pastures westward ho.
Hundreds of Rehanas, Sultanas, Kamlas and Sheilas have found new homes in Agra’s dalit basties and muslim mohallas. Nobody objects to their presence for they have integrated so well into the local social order, picking up the language and the norms of the communities they are now part of.
Surendra Singh of Kachchpura village behind the Taj Mahal explains: “a large number of Jatav boys fail to get married for various reasons, economics being one. Past 30 or 35 years of age, they have no choice but to go eastward and buy a girl for Rs.5 to 10 thousand. This includes commission to the agent, plus a lavish booze party. He returns within a week with a bride. The mohalla celebrates and welcomes the new member without any hassles. This has been going on for past few years. Muslims in Nagla Devjeet call a maulvi who conducts the Nikaah according to their system.”
In a number of cases men who can afford, buy two or three Paros for fun, hiring them as maidservants initially. Without a whimper of protest they resign to their destiny. “It is indeed insulting and humiliating to hear comments from agents who call them “maal” (product or commodity), cheaply available in abundance. Truck drivers help ferrying them across for a sum paid by the buyer,” adds Ramesh, a social worker of Trans Yamuna area.
Ehsaan of Garhi Chandni area said these women rarely created any adjustment problems “because their life in Agra is comparatively better than what they were leading back home, most on the verge of starvation. Their children too are easily integrated. One woman can easily motivate half a dozen others to marry locals who are looking for wives.”
Occasionally there is fracas over ownership of women. Three days ago the Mahila thana tackled one such case of Zekha, originally from Hazari Bagh district in Bihar, who had two claimants. She said she had divorced her first husband and married Vicky. But the former husband lodged a complaint with the police, which issued a search warrant. Zekha, five months pregnant, however was adamant and refused to go with the former husband who she said had kicked her out of the house, as she couldn’t bear him a child.
The brides from the east are much sought after as most are considered hardworking and a productive asset. Raja of Neem Darwaza said several handicapped youth in his locality who had failed to find brides bought girls from “dalals” running a racket that now extends to Jaipur and Delhi. A truck driver’s cleaner confirmed: “there are thousands of such girls married to people in Bharatpur and Alwar districts.” Both the Mevs and the Jats have no hang-ups taking the girls from the east as their wives, he informed.
One reason why the girls from the east are in demand in local dalit basties, “is that the sex ratio has been imbalanced in the past decade. Now there are fewer girls available and those of marriageable age often refuse to marry any Tom, Dick and Harry, because a large number of girls are now High School or eighth pass and have all the dreams and fantasies of the urban youth. Boys not well settled or without means are finding it difficult to get married to a local girl,” explains social worker Netra Pal Singh, a counselor for an all India women’s organization.
A police source said there has been a big influx of Bangladeshis in Agra, particularly in the last few years. But whenever an operation is launched they seem to disappear. “We can do nothing about women because they are lawfully wedded and nobody has raised any doubt or lodged a complaint.”
Interestingly, even the family members of the eastern bride do not know where she hails from, what is her background or who she has left behind. It is only the accent or the language these girls speak that distinguishes the identity. But after a couple of years even that difference disappears. For all practical purposes she is what her new surname denotes, says a Buddhist monk of Jagdishpura.
Agra: It hardly matters where they come from. Bangladesh, Bihar or from some nondescript district on eastern border. They have no past, worth remembering, and they seldom face an identity crisis, as both history and geography do not interest them. Poverty has driven them to seek greener pastures westward ho.
Hundreds of Rehanas, Sultanas, Kamlas and Sheilas have found new homes in Agra’s dalit basties and muslim mohallas. Nobody objects to their presence for they have integrated so well into the local social order, picking up the language and the norms of the communities they are now part of.
Surendra Singh of Kachchpura village behind the Taj Mahal explains: “a large number of Jatav boys fail to get married for various reasons, economics being one. Past 30 or 35 years of age, they have no choice but to go eastward and buy a girl for Rs.5 to 10 thousand. This includes commission to the agent, plus a lavish booze party. He returns within a week with a bride. The mohalla celebrates and welcomes the new member without any hassles. This has been going on for past few years. Muslims in Nagla Devjeet call a maulvi who conducts the Nikaah according to their system.”
In a number of cases men who can afford, buy two or three Paros for fun, hiring them as maidservants initially. Without a whimper of protest they resign to their destiny. “It is indeed insulting and humiliating to hear comments from agents who call them “maal” (product or commodity), cheaply available in abundance. Truck drivers help ferrying them across for a sum paid by the buyer,” adds Ramesh, a social worker of Trans Yamuna area.
Ehsaan of Garhi Chandni area said these women rarely created any adjustment problems “because their life in Agra is comparatively better than what they were leading back home, most on the verge of starvation. Their children too are easily integrated. One woman can easily motivate half a dozen others to marry locals who are looking for wives.”
Occasionally there is fracas over ownership of women. Three days ago the Mahila thana tackled one such case of Zekha, originally from Hazari Bagh district in Bihar, who had two claimants. She said she had divorced her first husband and married Vicky. But the former husband lodged a complaint with the police, which issued a search warrant. Zekha, five months pregnant, however was adamant and refused to go with the former husband who she said had kicked her out of the house, as she couldn’t bear him a child.
The brides from the east are much sought after as most are considered hardworking and a productive asset. Raja of Neem Darwaza said several handicapped youth in his locality who had failed to find brides bought girls from “dalals” running a racket that now extends to Jaipur and Delhi. A truck driver’s cleaner confirmed: “there are thousands of such girls married to people in Bharatpur and Alwar districts.” Both the Mevs and the Jats have no hang-ups taking the girls from the east as their wives, he informed.
One reason why the girls from the east are in demand in local dalit basties, “is that the sex ratio has been imbalanced in the past decade. Now there are fewer girls available and those of marriageable age often refuse to marry any Tom, Dick and Harry, because a large number of girls are now High School or eighth pass and have all the dreams and fantasies of the urban youth. Boys not well settled or without means are finding it difficult to get married to a local girl,” explains social worker Netra Pal Singh, a counselor for an all India women’s organization.
A police source said there has been a big influx of Bangladeshis in Agra, particularly in the last few years. But whenever an operation is launched they seem to disappear. “We can do nothing about women because they are lawfully wedded and nobody has raised any doubt or lodged a complaint.”
Interestingly, even the family members of the eastern bride do not know where she hails from, what is her background or who she has left behind. It is only the accent or the language these girls speak that distinguishes the identity. But after a couple of years even that difference disappears. For all practical purposes she is what her new surname denotes, says a Buddhist monk of Jagdishpura.
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